Mark your calendars - May 22.

http://www.paramount.com/startrek/hd/index.html

Grab it for yourself in High-Def Quicktime from the link above, and feel free to place your impression of it in the comments.

who never blogged anything at all,

his poor blog sat bored,

and the readers all snored,

methinks i might start to bawl.

(source: Anonymous)

1.First you must learn to pronounce the city's name. It is Sask-A-tune, not
"S'toon", and it DOES NOT matter how people who are not from here pronounce
it.

2. Saskatoon has its own version of traffic rules. Never forget that
downtown Saskatoon is composed in large part of three or four block
streets. The only way to get out of the center of town is to turn around
and start over when you reach the river.

3. All directions start with, "Go down Circle Drive ."

4. Circle Drive has no beginning and no end, although it does not actually
circle the entire city, either.

5. Exit and entry ramps on Circle Drive are just the recommended way of
entering and exiting Feel free to exit at any grassy point you wish.

6. The 8:00 a.m. rush hour is from 6:30 to 9:30 a.m. The 5:00 PM rush hour
is from 3:30 to 6:30 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.

7. If you actually stop at a yellow light, this is a dead giveaway that you
are a tourist.

8. Idylwyld can only be pronounced by a native Saskatonian , so do not
attempt the phonetic pronunciation. People will tilt their heads to the
right and stare at you.

9. Bingo, Bugs and Baseball are here to stay. DEAL WITH IT.

10. Construction on Saskatoon streets in summer is a way of life and a
permanent form of entertainment. Kind of like the weather.

11. Construction crews aren't doing their job properly unless they close
down all lanes except one during rush hour.

12. Many bizarre sights can be explained simply by uttering the phrase,
"Oh, we're in Sutherland".

13. We have a zoo. Well, it's not really a zoo. We just like to call it
a zoo.

14. We also have a nude beach that we call "Bareass Beach". No one really
knows where this is but everyone has heard of it so assume it is an urban
myth and does not really exist (except in the minds of Saskatonians).

15. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it was probably left on
at the factory where the car was made.

16. Buying a Saskatoon street map is a waste of money since the
termination or continuation of any street is entirely at the discretion
of the Works Department of the City. Our Works Department also has a fondness
for changing street names at mid-way points (typical instruction that a
northbound tourist may receive: "just head outta town on that road that used
to be Warman Road")

17. Asking directions will help you get acquainted with the residents. It
will not be any help at all for finding the address you seek.

18. Never honk your horn at another car in traffic. The bumper sticker
that reads,"Keep honking, I'm reloading." is considered a fair warning.

London, UK
July 2, 2007

The sculptor Blake is launching a new action group for artists who want to help victims of war, poverty and disease by raising money for charities supporting the victims of human injustice.

Motive launches its website (http://www.motive-art.org) this month with a call for artists to join the movement and donate their work or time to charitable projects.

Blake himself is donating the entire collection from his 2007 exhibition to the No More Landmines Trust and their mine clearance work across the developing world. He expects to raise more than £1 million from the sale of a series of quarter life size bronzes at his exhibition Fragments.

He said: "For centuries, artists have used their work to make political and social statements. But we believe this is not enough. We want to push art past commentary and into positive action. Our aim is simple but huge. We want artists to help create a better world."

Canadian-born Blake (http://www.blake.at) is a noted figurative sculptor who trained in Europe. His Fragments work was inspired by his visits to Vietnam, where he saw first-hand the horrors created by landmines. Each piece has been created in clay then partially destroßyed before being cast in bronze.

"I have called the exhibition Fragments because that's what landmines create. They shatter people's lives."

Blake stressed that he does not expect artists to follow his lead by giving away their entire collection.
"To launch Motive, I had to make a dramatic gesture, but clearly many artists will not be able to do this."

The Fragments Exhibition shows at the following locations:
August 13-24 The Smithfield Gallery, 16 West Smithfield, London EC1A 9HY
October 13-25 Chapter House, Canterbury Cathedral, Canterbury, Kent CT1 2EE
November 1-17 Royal Opera Arcade, 5 Pall Mall, London SW1Y 5NP

For more information about Motive and its website, or to request an interview with Blake, please contact Paul Sherrard via email at paul@motive-art.org

You see, today was "cleaning" day at work - sounds like a typical annual routine indeed - however, as a result of this yearly ritual... I discovered a most grotesque and alarming site.  This exact moment happened on approximately my 6th visit to said dumpster.  I was taking yet another load of old berry branches and brochures out to the trash when a most interesting gray container caught my eye.  The detective in me couldn't resist examining the contents of the gray anomaly.  This is where I saw it, a batch of frozen chicken wings sitting in the gray rubber box...sounds innocent enough I know, until you realize where the wings were located - all alone in the great outdoors on the filthy, wet ground.  Not to mention the wings were mere steps from the busy backdoor walkway of a well-known restaurant beside a towering red dumpster complete with greasy chef smoking directly overtop and today's raindrops bouncing from the metal waste bucket onto the meat.  Not only did one gray container of wings appear, another 2 loads joined the party as the day progressed (I can only assume today's special was WINGS).  Were the wings there to thaw or cool down?  I guess I will never know.  What I do know is that this particular reporter will NEVER order another order of 1/2 chicken salad or baked pasta from there ever again (not even in desperation or starvation as I have been doing for months now). 

The picture really says it all - observe:

I know by now you are dying to know what restaurant.  For those of you who know me, you will know.  For those of you who live in this city, you can probably guess.  For those of you who don't, just ignore this blog.  If anything, I hope this inspires my readers to rethink their 25 cent wing night.  

After my one month post-op appointment, my vision is about double what is was a week after surgery.  I can now see 20/30 out of my right eye when I squint really hard to look at the chart.  Strangely, though ... I still have swelling in that eye and it seems to be causing double vision and a slight haze.  My eye doctor was surprised to see there was still some swelling and has prescribed Flarex, an anti-inflammatry eye drop to try to reduce the swelling a bit ... hopefully faster!

I am really tired of having headaches.  =(  But, I am pretty hopeful now that things are getting back to normal and that one day soon I will be able to blink without using artificial tears every hour!  WAHOOOOOO!

Another appointment in 2 months ... stay tuned ... I know you are all *enthralled* by this fascinating saga.

“LASIK stands for Laser-Assisted In Situ Keratomileusis and is a procedure that permanently changes the shape of the cornea, the clear covering of the front of the eye, using an excimer laser. A knife, called a microkeratome, is used to cut a flap in the cornea. A hinge is left at one end of this flap. The flap is folded back revealing the stroma, the middlesection of the cornea. Pulses from a computer-controlled laser vaporize a portion of the stroma and the flap is replaced.” (Definition by USFDA)

I underwent the procedure 13 days ago, not without much anxiety. I was very nervous before hand and consulted many friends and family who had also undergone the surgery.  The reviews and experiences were mixed but all in all, very positive.  They ranged from waking up with 20/20 vision to having blurry vision for a few days.  All of the information that was provided to me by the optometrist and the surgeon led me to believe that I would most likely be able to return to normal activity within a couple of days of surgery with few noticeable side-effects.

This was true … for my left eye.  I woke up the next morning after surgery with 20/20 vision in my left eye and no trouble since.  The recovery of my right eye, however, has caused my endless amounts of grief, anxiety, anger and frustration.

My surgery was on Friday, April 6^th … which gave me a full weekend to recover before returning to work on Monday.  The vision in my right eye was good after surgery but declined steadily in the first 7 days post-surgery.  I don’t recall that it was ever 20/20 in that eye.  However, I did and still do have 20/20 vision with both eyes together.  But, as I discovered my first day back at work, 20/20 in one eye and 20/70 in the other means headaches and nausea.   And, it sucks.  But, I am still allowed to drive!  Even with my messed up depth perception!  Look out!

I have been unable to work at the computer for more than a couple of hours at a time since the surgery.  And, as a programmer, that basically means I can’t work.  I am very lucky that I have a great employer and very understanding and supportive coworkers as I was completely unprepared for what has now been a 2-week recovery and counting.

My first week follow-up appointment was when I found out I had 20/70 vision in the right eye.  As of today, I am unsure what it is. But, sometimes … for brief periods, it is much MUCH better.  My optometrist thinks the blurriness I am experiencing is a result of swelling of the cornea and should subside … eventually.  The timeframe for when that will happen is unclear.  And, if it does not subside, it can be corrected under warranty.  But, not for 6 months!  Until then, my vision may continue to fluctuate.  I am not happy about that.  My only options, if things don’t improve, are an interim pair of glasses (assuming the fluctuation stops) OR an EYE PATCH. 

Arrrrrrrr! (That’s me, being a pirate.  Yes, I like pirate jokes.  But, this is no joke.  Although, if you know any good ones, you should let me know.  There is nothing better than wearing an eye patch to really sell a pirate joke.)

So, in the meantime, I sit here waiting … still reserving judgement until my vision settles out.  But, my advice, if you are considering Lasik, put some thought into what you will do if things do not go according to plan.

• Mayor Don Atchison was drafted by the Pittsburgh Penguins in 1972
• Saskatoon’s first and only recorded earthquake occurred at 9:15 am on May 15, 1909. It lasted 30 seconds and was felt as far away as Winnipeg and Lethbridge.
• Saskatoon’s Municipal Swimming Pool on Avenue H in Victoria Park opened on July 15, 1925. Filtration and chlorination systems were primitive, and the pool was quickly dubbed the “Avenue Itch” pool. Despite having “its own peculiar smell, which was obvious for blocks” the pool was hugely popular with the people of Saskatoon. During the Depression, admission was “five cents if you had, free if you didn’t”.
• On July 17, 1951, Saskatoon’s new sewage station, in present-day Archibald Park, exploded.
• Mount Blackstrap officially opened  on December 15, 1970. Built for the 1971 Canada Winter Games, it required 900,000 cubic yards of  fill to create. The people of Saskatoon donated their used Christmas trees to be iced into its slopes to give an “alpine” feel to the ski runs.
• Saskatoon is derived from “mis-sask-quah-toomina,” the Cree Indian name for a local berry.
• Some of the first experiments done aboard the NASA space shuttle were a result of research conducted at the University of Saskatchewan.
• Saskatchewan separated from the Northwest Territories in 1905.
• Famous horror film star Boris Karloff performed in Saskatoon theatres before World War I.
• Seven bridges cross the south Saskatchewan river within the city limits.
• The city is one of the brightest in Canada, enjoying an average of 2,381 hours of sunshine every year.
• The 1930 U of S Men's Lit Chorus made very homely women

That's when it struck me ... a bunny suit!  A nice warm bunny suit.  It would be a total hit with the kids AND I would be warm.  I wouldn't mind posing for pictures either.  I think an Easter bunny should oblige his/her fans.  So, anyway, yeah ... if you want to get me something for Easter next year ... this is your hint.

Ruby ruby ruby ruby! - The Kaiser Chiefs' second album is exactly what The Killers' second album should have been.  Fun and catchy tunes throughout.

City and Colour - great lyrics, and who can fault anyone who mentions Saskatoon in a song?

No More Kings - great funk, seek them out! Oh, and if you love the Karate Kid, click the link.

Hmm, lessee, what else?  Oh, Alanis is the funniest Canadian singer ever.  You gotta love her lovely lady lumps.

The iPod shuffle is the perfect music player.  The new one is even better than the old one. iTunes even recognized that it was ORANGE. Hey, what's the proper way to start a sentence with an inter-capped word that starts with a lower-case i?  Yes, I'm totally owned by Apple.  Oh, so's Chris.  He got a Macbook Pro yesterday.. SOOOO NICE.

Got my Draenei shammy to 70, my paladin will be 70 this weekend.  Then I work on the priest.

Getting my ass back into the gym on Monday for a Summer Showdown with Cory.  Need to see who can be the fittest before heading to PAX in August.  Oh, I may be in NYC/New Jersey on May 2-4th, so if you want to go for a beer, let me know.  I may not even have time, as I'm spending most of my time giving presentations and attending meetings, if I even get to go.

This year's travel plans: NYC, Washington DC, Seattle, Atlanta, London, Miami.

So, what's new with you lot?

I thought I would take this blogtime to tell you about a few of the fun Juno events going on in Saskatoon starting TODAY!  If you didn’t know (or are from exotic locales other than Saskatoon) the Junos aka Canadian version of the Grammy awards, are in Saskatoon this weekend. 

Here goes: 

Junofest - Presented by Yahoo! Music Canada, JunoFest takes place in 15 venues across Saskatoon showcasing more than 100 local and national artists on Friday, March 30th and Saturday, March 31st, each night from 9 p.m. – 2 a.m. (CT).  Wristbands (to get you into multiple venues) are sold out – but you can still pay $10 at the venue of your choice to get in! 
 

Juno Cup – Ever wanted to see your favorite star play hockey?  Well here’s the chance to do so in Prince Albert.  Juno Cup fans can purchase tickets at $15 per ticket through the Raiders Ticketing Office at the Art Hauser Centre or by calling 306-764-GAME. 

Songwriters’ Circle – an intimate afternoon which will feature songs and stories from some of Canada’s finest songwriters happening Sunday, April 1 at the Sid Buckwold Theatre, TCU Place at 12 p.m. 

Juno Fanfare - Music fans will get the opportunity to meet some of their favourite Canadian artists up close at Juno Fan Fare, includes Mobile, Billy Talent, Three Days Grace and much more!  It all happens on Saturday, March 31 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. (CT) at Prairieland Park, Hall E, in Saskatoon.    

Best Dressed Store Competition - This fun competition will allow businesses to creatively “dress up” their retail outlet in celebration of Canadian music, and the JUNO Awards. Please feel free to visit these stores and see what they’ve done to Get in Tune!  Perhaps you will leave with your very own flashing guitar or Get In Tune CD!

Saskatoon Unplugged - Take a break and celebrate our unique creative spirit with live music by talented local musicians. From restaurants to furniture stores, clothing boutiques to coffee shops, enjoy the great sounds of Saskatchewan on March 30th & 31st between the hours 12-5pm.

Get In Tune After Party – CNH Place, Sunday April 1st. Saskatoon’s largest After Party for 4,000 music fans. This will be the official closing party for the weekend. SKAVENJAH, Riff Raff, and Men Without Shame will be rocking Saskatoon one last time. Doors open at 6:00 PM.  

Get in Tune Concert Series - Come check out some fantastic musicians. We have something for everyone and the best part of all – it’s free! These rising stars will
perform each week to gear us up for the 2007 Juno Awards, Canada’s Music Awards, which will be the most exciting weekend in Saskatoon this year!

Not to mention the actual Juno AWARDS & CTV Red Carpet… Nelly Furtado hosts the 36th Annual JUNO Awards broadcast from the Credit Union Centre in Saskatoon, SK. Be sure you’re watching CTV on Sunday April 1 5 PM (CT).  More tickets will be going on sale tomorrow… 

So in conclusion, whatever you are into these days… there is something fun for you to DO this weekend!  So go do something!  Even if you are anti-Juno for some reason, you won’t be able to hide from all the fun!  And remember, the StarPhoenix is accepting all pictures of stars you might happen to snap!!  Visit http://www.junoawards.ca for more info.